Life in 2021 offers many opportunities to embrace change and lead in the manner that we want to; to become the leader we want to. But alongside those, numerous challenges as well. As leaders, we must equip ourselves with the ability to embrace both with curiosity and an open heart. However, the stress levels that many leaders live with put us into a survival mode, with our bodies overrun with adrenaline and cortisol. This state does not allow us to grow or thrive in the long term.

To equip our leaders, we have an underlying process for getting fit to lead for the long term. G.R.I.T. (Gratitude, Resilience, Integrity & Trust) in both those around us and ourselves. Having G.R.I.T allows us to accept where we are, know who we are and what we can do and trust that we will do the best of the people with what we know now. It gives us conviction.

By working on building up each of these areas we are in a position to accept and capitalise on all opportunities that present themselves as well as bounce back from any challenges that we might encounter. G.R.I.T gives is the conviction we need to play the long game and achieve our long-term goals.

Building G.R.I.T. is a personal commitment to growth, but it is easier if you are working with a peer or coach who can hold you accountable for the work you will have to do on yourself.

How to build G.R.I.T. is internal work, we spend most of our time measuring and comparing ourselves based on the external work we do, what we achieve, the actions we cross of our To-Do list, but often this focus on external work doesn’t allow us to hold the course and accomplish what we really want to. Even more disappointing is that often when we do tick off these items the satisfaction and fulfilment is short-lived.

By combining the Inner work to build G.R.I.T we align our external work with a stronger sense of purpose, strength and understanding of who we are. As leaders, we are role models for those around us, by demonstrating strong G.R.I.T we are laying down a blueprint for sustainable success for those around us.

So what do we mean by G.R.I.T. and how do you build it?

Gratitude

The more one accepts where you are in life and is grateful for everything you have in life, the easier it is to lift our mood and mindset. We all have many positive aspects in our lives, from clean running water, to roofs over our heads, to the ability to read and write. The majority of the 7 billion people living on this planet are far more blessed and abundant than all of the generations who preceded us. And yet most of us choose to complain about what we feel we are lacking. Just taking 10 minutes during the day to write a list of all the great things in your life can make a noticeable difference in a very short period of time. The reason for this is most humans naturally focus on the negative that has happened each day, especially if we are in survival mode, as most of us are due to chronic stress. Shifting your focus to all the positive that you have or have happened to you each day, helps us reset our inner barometer, moving us towards a more positive outlook. With practice, you start to realise that usually there are far more positives in our lives than negatives. You will start emphasising the positives as they become more apparent as you begin to look for them. This shift in perspective makes it much easier to bounce back from challenges.

To build Gratitude, thy this little exercise.

Every night before you go to bed, grab a piece of paper, or do this on your phone and write a list of the 10 things that you are grateful for that day. These don’t need to be large items, it can be as simple as the fact that it did not rain whilst you were walking the dog, or that everyone in your family is healthy, or that the kids slept in just a little longer that gave you a chance to have a moment for yourself in the morning. Whatever it is, find 10. Don’t stop until you get to 10, go through your entire day and find those moments of gratitude and positivity. If you are really stuck, think of the negative. What could have gone worse? Often when we think of the worst-case scenario, we quickly become grateful for the fact that it didn’t happen.

Doing this little exercise for just 30 days will start bringing in a moment of pure gratitude before you sleep, and you will start to feel and experience the difference this has on your mindset and mood. For an extra boost, try doing this every morning as well.

Resilience

Resilience is the ability and speed to recover from a setback. The more resilience you have the faster you can get back to your best. Life will always throw curve balls at us, that is what makes it interesting, but being able to get back on track quickly & successfully is what most leaders need to faster than most. It is important to emphasise the “successfully” in the previous sentence. Most people have been taught to put on a brave face and just get on with it. This is not building resilience, in fact, it creates the opposite effect. The more we “push on through” the less we actually recover and heal, we are just delaying it, and over time the result is burnout.

So how do you build resilience? It is a combination of physical, mental and emotional factors that together lead to faster recovery and improved tolerance of stress. Look at each of these areas and find one small change that you can make for the next 30 days to start incrementally improving your resilience.

Some examples may be:

• Physical – got to bed 30 mins earlier each day to ensure you are getting more sleep, reduce your caffeine or alcohol intake, I am not saying give it up, just reduce it a bit. Try to walk outside for 20 min three times a week
• Mental – Make building a plan for the day the first thing you do at the beginning of each workday. Schedule your calendar with each of the tasks you need to complete. I know many of us have the burden of back-to-back video calls with little time to do. But you can say no. Most of us are too scared to and fear the repercussions. But plan your day. I tend to plan my week and limit the number of tasks that I will complete. By doing this, I have a clear view of where I need to focus my energy and clarity on what to achieve
• Emotional – Could you learn to meditate for 5 minutes a day? Could you find time to do your hobby each day to bring some joy and relaxation into each day? Could you phone a friend just for a quick chat to improve your mood and connection to someone else? Finding small acts that connect us to what we love doing and the people we love improves our mental state

Integrity

The classic definition of integrity, as we use daily, is around honesty, ethical principles and sticking to our morals, but I also love the dictionary.com secondary definition:

Integrity - the state of being whole, entire, or undiminished.

We must live and lead our lives in a way that is undiminished by our egos, entirely focused on our goals, our passions and for a cause, we can wholly commit ourselves to.

Leading with integrity requires us to be our whole selves at all times, not playing the part that may be expected of us. I demand that I stay as present as I can, but that doesn’t mean that I am the best me all of the time. I can be tired, grumpy, or even worse, hungry, and that will lower my performance levels, and that is OK. Integrity doesn’t expect perfection, they ask for honesty. I have to be honest with myself and others. It is OK to say “Sorry, I am really tired/upset/hungry today, so whilst I will try to give you my best answer/performance/time, it may not be as good as it would be after a great night’s sleep.”

Knowing what you stand for and who you truly are will give you the power to make the choices you need to make to succeed.

Below is a quick exercise to help you build integrity into your actions and those of the people you lead and serve

• Write down the main activities you spend your time each day. Are there any there that are just distractions? A distraction is anything that doesn’t progress you towards your desired goals.
• Get real with yourself and take responsibility for how you spend your time. And stop doing anything that is a distraction.
• Once you are clear on the actions you are and need to take to progress, write down how you want to achieve them. Do you want to do them with pride, inspiration, diligence, caring, honesty? What are the values behind your actions as a leader? Remember your actions aren’t just the tasks you do but how you do them!
• Share your values with others, so that it is easier to explain to them the decisions you are making. Sharing your values also helps you become more accountable to them. If you want to lead with honesty, then you are going to examine your communications and conversation to ensure that they are honest.
• You can also do this activity as a team to create team values and debate them. Make sure that they resonate with each member of the team and become a code you can all operate by,

Trust

Trust is not logical. It is an emotion allowing you to be vulnerable. It enables you to make the choice to open up to another and connect at a level much deeper than we usually do. By adding depth to our connections with those we lead and serve we build understanding and openness. Trust also gives you so much strength. As a leader the more trust you have in yourself and your team, the more you can dedicate your time and energy to the tasks that only you can do. You can only trust others as much as you trust yourself, that is the only catch with trust. So working on trust yourself, your decision and your actions is the important starting point.

Here is a simple exercise to start building that self-trust.

Sit down and close your eyes. Take five deep breaths, counting to four on the inhale and six on the exhale. Slowly bring your attention to your body. Where are you tense? Where do you feel relaxed? Carry on breathing deeply and letting the tension flow out of your body. When you are feeling relaxed and calm, bring your focus to your gut. Is your gut feeling relaxed or tense? If you feel tension there, carry on breathing and slowly let this tension release. Once you feel relaxed ask yourself the question that has been worrying you. For example, “Can I trust this individual?” or “Is this the right house/job/car for me?” You can either say this in your head (preferable in public places) or out loud. Notice the reaction in your gut. Does your gut stay relaxed or is there a tightening? Any tightening is your body giving you a clear sign that it is not comfortable with the situation. Our gut reaction is there for a reason; learn to listen to it, and it becomes an incredible tool that can help you navigate complex situations and remain authentic to who you really are.

Spending just a small about of focus each day on these four areas will truly make you fit to lead.

 by Helen Honisett

Helen is a seasoned and successful business leader with a rare blend of expertise in learning and advanced technology. Her specialism is in managing and growing businesses through change by leading sales organisations in a way that pivots the whole organisation around the customer.

Helen is the author of the book Defy Expectations, that looks at how leading with love, integrity and trust can build and bond teams much more effectively than traditional methods.  In fact, the methodology described in the book led to a 12% growth in sales revenue and a 2% decrease in overall cost when last implemented. Available for purchase at Amazon